


How Great My Life Is

by MarchOfTheFalseHeteros



Category: Falsettos - Lapine/Finn
Genre: Coffee Shops, F/F, Meet-Cute
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-02-09
Updated: 2017-02-09
Packaged: 2018-09-23 01:23:15
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 947
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/9634496
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/MarchOfTheFalseHeteros/pseuds/MarchOfTheFalseHeteros
Summary: This is how I imagine Charlotte and Cordelia met. This takes place sometime before Marvin and Whizzer met.





	

Wednesdays are never anyone’s favorite day- it’s usually right behind Monday on most people’s “worst day of the week” lists. But for Cordelia Murphy, one particular Wednesday was about to become the best day of her life. It started out like any other Wednesday- waking up at 7 to get to the coffee shop by 8:30, yuppie customers screaming for their lattes, and just begging for the day to be over. A brief reprieve occurred around noon when her best friend Whizzer arrived, as he usually did around this time of day.  
  
"‘Scuse me, ma'am,“ the man drawled, leaning against the counter, "you come here often?”  
"Hey, Whiz Kid. I’ll be off in a bit; we can grab lunch then.“  
"Deedee, you’ve become a slave.”  
"Hey,“ the blonde replied, "every hour I spend here is one hour closer to my catering company. You should be grateful- one day people will be lining up to try my food."  
"If you can learn to make latkes as good as you make mocha frapps, sure they will."  
Cordelia wrinkled her nose playfully. "There’s a penalty for loitering, ya know. One large mocha frapp, then?”  
"Can I get a discount, since I know the artiste in question?“  
"Haha, very funny."  
  
Cordelia started on Whizzer’s coffee, but just as she was about to pour in his signature splash of Grand Marnier (which she never told her boss about), something caught her eye. Someone, rather. A woman, probably in her thirties, with beautiful dark skin and wavy black hair, wearing a navy blue pantsuit, was sitting alone at a center table, reading a magazine Cordelia couldn’t quite make out, but which looked important. Her heart fluttered slightly. Whizzer noticed.  
"You like her?”  
"I mean…kind of.“  
"Go talk to her.”  
"Oh my God, Whizzer, no! Who knows if she’s even gay. Besides, how tacky would I look just walking up to a random woman and going 'hey, how are you, I’m a lesbian, wanna kiss me?“  
Whizzer chuckled lightly. "Is that really all the game you have? Here, let me show you how it’s done.”  
"WHIZZER! Oh my God, stop! Please!“  
  


She continued to protest, to no avail, as the slinky brunette made his way to the table where the pretty black lady sat.  
"Hey, sweetheart,” he said, doing his best impression of a heterosexual, “come here often?”  
The woman grimaced, and went back to reading her magazine. Whizzer, slightly intimidated now, but only slightly, sat beside her, now taking notice of the magazine she was reading.  
“Medical journal, huh?"  
"Mhmm,” said the woman, barely grunting.  
"See, I like smart women. Maybe you and I could play doctor sometime.“  
"Look, pal,” snapped the woman, clearly mustering all her strength to not pound the table with her fists, “I don’t know if you can’t take a hint or if you’re just a pig, but I’m not interested.”  
"Well, that’s good, cause Cordelia here is!“  


Cordelia, who had watched the dreadful proceedings almost entirely through her hands, was then forcibly dragged to the table, protesting all the way.  
"Oh my God, hi, um, please excuse my friend, he’s nuts… and…um…oh wow, is that a medical journal? You must be so smart, oh my God, I’m so sorry, I must sound like a complete idiot next to you…oh my God."  
"You definitely don’t,” the woman said, her sharp tone having melted away, and whose frown had turned to a warm smile. “You don’t have to be sorry. Your friend, on the other hand… what did you say your name was?”  
"I didn’t.“ He extended his hand, and proceeded with the greeting he only used for a select audience. "Hello, I’m Whizzer Brown, and I’m a homosexual."  
The woman seemed taken aback for a moment, and for a moment Cordelia’s heart sank with the fear that it was because of the final word.  
"Whizzer?” she said finally. “Why do…"  
"Don’t ask,” he and Cordelia said simultaneously.  
The woman turned her attentions toward the blonde. “And you’re Cordelia, you said? Pretty name. Unusual."  
"Oh God, wow, thank you…” Whizzer put a hand on her shoulder before she could ramble any further.  
"Very nice to meet you, Cordelia. Whizzer.“ She said his name with slight snark, but it was clear she was warming up to him somewhat. "I’m Charlotte."  
She extended her hand to shake Cordelia’s. The blonde’s heart fluttered again, but this time more fervently. Charlotte’s watch beeped.  
  
"Well, I have to get back to work. It was nice meeting you two.” She quickly put on her white coat, which had been sitting on her chair the whole time, and which the two were just now realizing had a name tag on it- Dr. Charlotte Dubois.  
"Oh wow…you’re a doctor?“ Cordelia gasped.  
"That’s right. Internist at Mount Sinai."  
"Damn, I was kidding,” Whizzer joked.  
Charlotte smirked again. “Oh! Wait…before I go.”  
She quickly grabbed a napkin and scribbled something with a pen from her lapel, and handed it to Cordelia. She winked, and walked out the door. Cordelia, not wanting to take her eyes off of her, followed her almost instinctively, nearly walking out the door with her. Finally, she glanced at the napkin Charlotte gave her. 10 digits. It was her phone number. She looked back at Whizzer, who was looking at her smugly.  


“Well?"  
"THANK YOU THANK YOU THANK YOU!” she squealed, running towards him and jumping into his arms.  
"Hey,“ chuckled Whizzer, spinning her, then setting her down. "No need to thank me."  
"How did you know that would work?,” said Cordelia breathlessly  
"Look at me, Deedee. Any woman who can resist me has got to be a lesbian.”


End file.
